Legal Antics

Turkey for me, turkey for you.

Have a great T-Day!

"Insecure, moody and fairly damaged"? Say no more-I'm sold!

From a recent Craiglist posting:

Perfect on Paper - 24

Here's the thing, it's easy for people to lie about themselves, or even tell the truth but spin it. Given that, I can make myself look pretty damn good without saying anything untrue. I'm 24, single, extremely intelligent with a degree from a top ten school, attending a top 5 law school. I play guitar and sing very well, I've been in bands and I write lovely little pop songs. I'm cute, in a geeky, part-Jewish kind of way. I write well, I read tons, and I can talk about anything (except for most sports, though sometimes I can fake it.) I can hold my liquor but avoid drinking to extremes. I am funny as hell, with a quick, sarcastic wit. I cook-- once I've made you breakfast, you're mine. I am sweet, caring, and sensitive.

Thing is, the way people write about themselves around here, none of that sounds very special, does it? But there is more. Perfect on paper is boring in person, but I'm a lot more complicated than that. I'm insecure, moody, and fairly damaged-- I like to think of that as the bitter kick that makes the sweetness all the better. I'm also a little bit more sex-driven than the typical "perfect guy." That's probably a good thing too.

I'm not posting a photo cause my friends will mock me endlessly if they see this ad. Of course, I will trade. If you want to get to know me and find out all my dark secrets, just send me an email. Stand forewarned that I like long, thoughtful messages, both sending and receiving them.

Hat tip: Above The Law.

Because oxycondone fixes everything.

1PM Don't Practice Law Without It

Worker #1: I mean, I just want to tell them I can't make them feel better. *Bob* can't make them feel better. *Katrina* can't make them feel better. Their doctors can't make them feel better.

Worker #2: No, that's what the oxycodone is for.

Law Office
Northern California
via Overheard in the Office, Nov 12, 2008

The headline says it all.

Bush: 'I regret saying some things I shouldn't have said' (CNN)

"I regret saying some things I shouldn't have said," Bush told CNN's Heidi Collins when asked to reflect on his regrets over his two terms as president. "Like 'dead or alive' and 'bring 'em on.' My wife reminded me that, hey, as president of the United States, be careful what you say."

Mild-mannered law student by day...

Bad-ass laptop defender by night:

ASU student Alex Botsios said he had no problem giving a nighttime intruder his wallet and guitars.

When the man asked for Botsios' laptop, however, the first-year law student drew the line."I was like, 'Dude, no -- please, no!" Botsios said. "I have all my case notes…that's four months of work!"...

At that point, the law student wrestled the bat away and began punching (the burglar)...

Police said they took (the intruder) to the hospital for stitches before they arrested him on charges of armed robbery and kidnapping. Other than a bruised knuckle and a few scratches, Botsios was unharmed.

KPHO via Above the Law.

See what the law can do to your morale?

5PM The Highest Aspiration in Norristown

Young attorney #1: I look like an old woman in this coat.

Young attorney #2: Maybe a slutty old woman.

Young attorney #1: I wish I was a slutty old woman.

Norristown, Pennsylvania
via Overheard in the Office, Oct 9, 2008

"Sexy time"? Borat? Is that you?

Lawyer Is LOOKING FOR A SEXY FEMALE PERSONAL ASSISTANT (Downtown LA)

---

Reply to: gigs-902322956@craigslist.org ^[?]
Date: 2008-11-01, 6:50PM PDT

The job: answer the phone, organize my agenda, book meetings, pick me up or drop me off at the airport. Shopping and dinner or a movie with me; some sexy time with me. This is in the adult section for a reason.

The pay: 2,500 a week part time or 4,000 a week full time plus help pay your bills, rent and shopping for clothing.

Part-time is a very good opportunity if you are in college as the schedule is very flexible.

Email me about you, include also some pics.

Please stop marking this post as Spam... It is not!

• Location: Downtown LA
• it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
• Compensation: $2,500-$4,000

PostingID: 902322956

Gen Y in action

Via the Billable Hour comes the following greeting card/comic. 

For more lawyer cartoons, visit www.Stus.com:

George, I'm gonna miss you.

Bitter Lawyer-Gayholm Sydrome

It's episode 5 of the Bitter Lawyer, for your viewing enjoyment: